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Colette New Orleans Review: The French Quarter’s Fantasyland

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Ready to get freaky in the French Quarter? We hit up Colette New Orleans for a night of theme parties, voyeur rooms, and BYOB shenanigans – here’s the honest, cheeky review you need.

By: Kat Swings

The Colette brand knows what it’s doing. With clubs in Houston, Dallas, Austin, and New Orleans, the owners John & Jackie (who we have yet to meet) have built a small empire of lifestyle hotspots – and their NOLA flagship is arguably the crown jewel. We were sufficiently impressed. A short Uber ride from Bourbon Street (or easy walk from Naughty N’awlins Astor or Nopsi hotels), this discreet little den of debauchery has hosted everyone from curious newbies to seasoned swingers, goth goddesses to lingerie-clad libertines. And us? Oh, we came, we saw, we… well, let’s just say we did a very thorough vibe check. Welcome to Colette New Orleans – here’s the uncensored scoop.

We dish on all this and more plus give lots of questionable newbie advice on the Vanilla Swingers podcast

Colette New Orleans exterior

Colette New Orleans Review

🚗 Distance – Downtown, walking distance from Canal/Bourbon

🕓 Hours –     

        Wednesday –  9pm – 2am
        Thursday      –  9pm – 2am
       Friday            –  9pm – 4am
        Saturday    –  9pm – 4am

💲 Pricing – 

  • 👦🏻👧🏻 Couples – 
    Wednesday –  $40
    Thursday      –  $30
    Friday            –  $70
    Saturday      –  $70

  • 👦🏻 Single Male –  Not allowed on Saturdays
    Wednesday –  $100
    Thursday      –  $100
    Friday            –  $120

  • 👧🏻 Single Female – 
    Wednesday –  $10
    Thursday      –  $10
    Friday            –  $20
    Saturday      –  $20

💸 Membership Levels – Can buy a 1 night, 3 months, 1 year or VIP memberships. Depends on your level of slutton! Of course we opted for the 1 night option!! 

        Annual       – $200
        3 Months  $100
        1 Night       $30

        3 year    – $5000
        1  year    $2500
        6 mos     $1500

Colette New Orleans bar

👀 First Impressions – No neon signs. No red lights. Just a big green door with a peephole and a vague “are-we-in-the-right-place?” energy. Which, to be honest, we loved. It’s giving Eyes Wide Shut minus the masks. Once you push open that mysterious door, you’re greeted by a desk and a very professional front-of-house staff who will check your ID, registration code, and possibly your astrological chart (kidding, but they are thorough). We appreciated the Apple Pay option – because nothing kills a vibe faster than digging through your purse for cash. If you come through as a Naughty N’awlins attendee, your lanyard will circumnavigate any membership fees.

Kat tip: Do the online membership ahead of time. It makes check-in smooth and sexy.

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🎟️ Inside Tour –  Downstairs is your social base camp – a long BYOB bar, mixers provided, your own bottle hidden somewhere in your purse (kidding!), plenty of seating, and a dance floor with a stripper‑pole stage that beckons the wild. The music is good, the crowd’s warming up, and you can easily hang in the lounge for a drink and some people‑watching.

Upstairs is where the play really happens. We found a multi‑room layout – a dark “theatre” room showing porn with couches, a “library” area with bookshelves and oversized seating that quickly morphs into play territory, curtain‑draped sections (some sheer, some opaque) each containing beds, two private rooms with doors, and a large voyeur‑focused room featuring a circular bed and windows for watching. The décor shows its age in places (worn couches, creaky bed frames, very low lighting which can make navigating tricky), but the layout delivers serious possibility and oozes Big Easy charm. 

PRO TIP: Arrive early for upstairs if you want a private room before they’re claimed.

Colette New Orleans dance floor

🎵 DJ/Dance – Colette may be discreet on the outside, but once you’re inside, the music tells you everything you need to know – this place knows how to party. The DJ doesn’t miss, whether it’s Top 40, EDM, throwback bangers, or a little booty-grinding R&B, the vibe is always on point. The volume’s loud enough to move your hips, but not so deafening you can’t flirt with the couple next to you. And yes, the dance floor stays packed.

Even during Naughty N’awlins weekend – when 3,000 swingers are living their best lives over at the Astor – Colette still managed to pull a packed crowd. This isn’t a dance club with a swinger twist – it’s a swinger club that knows how to throw down on the dance floor. Whether you’re doing a full grind sesh with your partner or just sipping your drink and watching the heat build, the energy is high and the crowd is ready.

Colette New Orleans library room

🍒 Playrooms – Upstairs at Colette is where the social vibe flips into full-blown fantasy. The layout is a mix of private, semi‑private, and look‑at‑me spaces that give you total freedom to set the tone for your night. There are a couple of fully private rooms with real doors (actual, blessed doors) which are clutch if you want quiet one‑on‑one time without lurkers or silhouettes drifting past a curtain. These go fast, especially on Saturdays, so couples who know the drill head upstairs early to stake their claim.

Most of the action, though, happens in the long curtain-lined corridor. Each “room” is actually an alcove with a bed separated by two curtains – one sheer, one blackout. You control your level of exhibitionism. It has that sexy shared-energy feel where you might hear the couple beside you, catch shadow play through the curtains, or get a little audience without feeling exposed. It’s raw, it’s intimate, and it’s very New Orleans.

Then there’s the notorious circular bed room, which is basically Colette’s unofficial stage. The whole thing is surrounded by one-way glass, so guests outside can watch while you see only your own reflection. It’s made for exhibitionists – or couples who want to dabble without fully diving in. Just know the bed has some… mileage. If you’re planning acrobatics, maybe stick to the edges.

You’ll also find a porn theater with small couches and a “library” room that feels like a loungy warmup space for softer, more sensual play. The whole upstairs is kept deliberately dark – sexy, yes, but also “where did my shoe go?” dark. And while some furniture looks well-loved, the variety and vibe more than make up for it.

Fridays bring more watchers (hello, single‑guy night), while Saturdays are the sweet spot for couples who want heat without the hover. Either way, know your rules, grab a room early, and let the night take over.

Colette New Orleans playroom

🔥 Vibe check – The crowd at Colette really depends on the night, so choosing when you go makes all the difference. Saturdays are generally the gold standard – couples-only, maybe a few single ladies, and a sexy, low-pressure vibe that feels playful but respectful. The energy builds throughout the night, with most of the action picking up after 11 p.m. You’ll see couples in their 30s, 40s, even a few fabulous 60-somethings getting flirty and having fun. No judgment, no pressure – just people doing their thing at their own pace.

Fridays are a totally different animal. Single men are allowed in, and while many are respectful, the sheer number can shift the energy. More watchers, more hoverers, and occasionally a guy who mistakes “curious glance” for “please stand at the foot of my bed and breathe heavily.” If you’re into that, great! If not, just know the staff does a good job stepping in when needed, and there are still plenty of ways to carve out your own space. Weeknights, especially Newbie Nights on Wednesdays, tend to be more chill. The crowd is smaller, the pace slower, and it’s a solid way to dip your toes in without feeling like you’ve been dropped into a full-blown sex hurricane.

Overall, Colette’s vibe is what you make of it. Some nights feel electric, others more relaxed. But whether you’re just there to watch, to play, or to flirt in your fishnets with a martini in hand, chances are you’ll find your people.

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✅ Would we go back? – In a heartbeat. If you’re on the fence about Colette, go. Absolutely. The space is sexy, the staff is solid, and the location? Peak French Quarter filth and flair. It’s got that moody, old-school Big Easy energy – exposed brick walls, a dark little library, vintage couches that have definitely seen some things. It’s charming, sultry, and full of character in a way most swinger clubs just aren’t. And Colette knows how to pull a crowd. That critical mass matters, because a packed club is a sexy club.

Find all of this and more on this episode of our top-rated swingers podcast for new couples to the lifestyle, the Vanilla Swingers podcast!

Naughty Links and Extras! (Fun, Irreverent, and Maybe Passably Useful)

Colette New Orleans: A French Quarter gem with moody vibes, packed dance floors, and seductive playrooms. Gritty, sexy, and dripping in Big Easy charm.

Swinger Lingo (check Swinger Dictionary for more!)

Swingers club: The playground of pleasure, where fantasies come to life and every night is a tantalizing adventure. A dedicated venue where individuals or couples within the swinging community gather to socialize, explore their sexuality, and engage in consensual sexual activities with other like-minded individuals.

Playroom: The adult’s version of a candy store, where toys, tools, and tantalizing treats await – because who says pleasure is just for kids? A designated space within a swinger’s venue equipped with various toys, equipment, and furnishings for sexual exploration and enjoyment.

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