Listen up. If you’re prepping for your first Bliss Cruise and staring at your suitcase like it’s a Rubik’s Cube of thongs, heels, and “do I need 9 bikinis?” panic—breathe. Auntie Kat’s got you.
We’ve done this rodeo. We’ve packed too much, not enough, forgot the lube (never again), and even learned that Royal Caribbean will politely hand you a towel if your booty’s too cheeky for dinner. So here it is, no filter—the ultimate Bliss Cruise packing tips.
Don’t forget to check out more newbie swinger advice in our Vanilla Swingers podcast.
Daytime Vibes: Light, Bright, and Practically Naked
It’s hot. It’s humid. Everyone’s half-naked. You don’t need 20 outfits. Bring:
1-2 swimsuits (rotate and repeat)
Shorts, tanks, tees, maybe a summer dress
Flip-flops or sandals
A sunhat or ball cap (hat hair is better than heat stroke)
CLEAN UNDERWEAR. Trust me. Moist coital happens. I go through 2 a day. LOL.
I lived in a swimsuit and sarong all day. The other half of my closet stayed untouched like a sad ex. Pack light, pack smart.
Nighttime: Theme Slay or Dinner Chic?
Dinner? Sexy casual.
Guys: khakis + short sleeve button-down = golden.
Ladies: a dress or, better yet, your theme wear.
Yes, you can wear theme wear to dinner. Just keep the nipples hidden (they’re picky like that). I’ve seen sheer tops with pasties and dudes in suspenders get the green light. And if your booty’s hanging out? They’ll hand you a towel. Own it.
One pair of PJs is plenty. Who’s sleeping in clothes anyway?
Theme Nights: Go Big or Go Nude
The more you commit, the more fun you’ll have. Period. Look up your theme nights and start shopping on Amazon, Shein, Temu—go nuts.
Sequins? Yes.
Mesh? Bring it.
Glow-in-the-dark banana hammock? Chef’s kiss.
And for the girls?? LOL! Guys, this goes for you too. Ditch the shy guy routine. Be bold, be fabulous, be that sparkly slut king.
Sexytime Looks: Undress to Impress
After theme night, people slip into something a little more… inviting. Think:
Lingerie sets (yes, pack 3–4)
Sheer robes
Sexy slippers
Silk pj pants for the gents (Leo rocks this. No shirt. Ever.)
There’s something magical about strolling the halls in a sheer number, grabbing pizza with your nipples slightly visible. 11/10 would recommend. Be your sexy self!
Cruise Hacks and Essentials
🔌 USB Adapter – Royal Caribbean says four USB ports max per unit, so pick a sleek one that charges your phone, your speaker, and your toys without setting off alarms. Sexy AND efficient.
🇪🇺 Euro to US Adapter – There’s usually one sneaky Euro outlet in your cabin. Snag an adapter with a regular plug + two USB slots and you’ve just hacked your room setup like a kinky electrician.
🚫 No Power Strips – Power strips are banned, baby. Don’t get your stuff confiscated. Stick to single outlet solutions or feel the wrath of security.
🧳 RC Luggage Tags – Print those cruise tags in color and slide them into clear luggage tag holders made for RC. Less drama = more drinks faster.
🚢 Seapass Lanyard – Whether you buy the $5 WOW band or wear your card around your neck like a sexy backstage pass, you’ll need your Seapass for everything. Drinks. Door. Getting back on the boat. Don’t lose it.
🍾 2 Bottles of Wine – Even if you’re team Drink Package, bring your two allowed bottles of wine or champagne in your carry-on. Great for pre-gaming, nightcaps, or gifting your favorite podcast hosts. Wink wink.
🧴 Sunscreen – Reef-safe, normal, glitter SPF… whatever makes you feel cute and protected. Just don’t be the crispy sunburnt girl by day 2.
🎒 Day Bag – I’m obsessed with my pineapple cinch sack. Light, cute, and just roomy enough for lube, lip gloss, and condoms. Or, you know, normal cruise stuff.
Odds n’ Ends: The Sexy Survival Kit
👠 Bandaids – Stripper heels are hot until your pinky toe starts screaming. Bandaids = lifesavers. Your feet will thank you.
🌀 Dramamine/Patches – Trust me, even seasoned swingers can get seasick. Don’t let queasiness kill your vibe (or your blowjob game). Bring backups.
🧺 Dirty Laundry Bag – Where are you throwing that thong on night four? Exactly. Bring a Target bag, collapsible hamper, or anything that keeps your crusty undies contained.
🚿 Shampoo & Conditioner – Already stocked in your shower. Save the space for extra lingerie or a blow-up unicorn (ahem).
🩸 Menstrual Products – Diva cups, tampons, pads—pack what you need because ship prices are rude. Aunt Flo doesn’t care about your cruise schedule.
💊 Advil – For hangovers, sore knees, or post-orgy migraines. You’ll use it more than you think. Cruise responsibly.
🍆 BYOC – Bring Your Own Condoms – Yes, there are tons floating around the ship, but it never hurts to have your own stash. But, “Got a condom?” is the ultimate icebreaker.
💧 Water Bottle – Optional but nice to have in your room. You can always snag ice water from the buffet or room service, but a bottle’s handy for bedside hydration after some high-calorie cardio.
🍳 Room Service Hack – Continental breakfast? Totally free. Full hot breakfast or midnight munchie order of 3 burgers, fries, and cookies? Flat $9. Order like a queen. No regrets.
Kat & Leo’s Faves: Add These. Trust.
🔊 Bluetooth Speaker – Your room deserves a vibe, babe. Whether it’s sultry sax for seduction or booty-bouncing beats for a post-play pizza party with our EPIC PLAYLIST, music matters. But don’t rely on the ship’s Wi-Fi—it’s about as reliable as a single guy claiming he’s “not a unicorn.” Download your playlists in advance and cue the sexy soundtrack.
💡 Mood Lighting – Just because you’re on a boat doesn’t mean you can’t channel your inner red-light-district goddess. We bring battery-powered LED rope lights to outline the bed (for obvious reasons), and sometimes even our portable solar system projector—because why not turn your ceiling into an intergalactic orgy backdrop?
💌 Slut Cards – Are they effective? Sometimes. Are they adorable, flirty conversation starters? Absolutely. Add your name, cabin number, Kik handle, and a saucy pic. Worst case, you become a collectible.
🚪 Door Decor – This is where the real show happens. We’ve seen everything from glittery banners to inflatable dolls, dry erase boards with daily games, magnet poems, Barbie orgies, and full-on LED strip shows. Decorate your door like your social life depends on it—because it kinda does.
🧲 Magnets, Magnets, Magnets – The ship is made of metal, so get creative! Flat magnets for decorations, hook magnets to hang lingerie or lights, magnetic clips for slut cards or candy bags. You’ll think you brought enough—you didn’t. Double it.
Find all of this and more on this episode of our top-rated swingers podcast for new couples to the lifestyle, the Vanilla Swingers podcast!
Naughty Links and Extras! (Fun, Irreverent, and Maybe Passably Useful)
Bliss Cruise – NO AFFILIATE LINKS. Buy direct or find a travel agent (same price).
CruiseMapper – Find a sister vanilla ship to throw your friends off the swinging scent and keep your steamy adventures under wraps.
Cruise Drinks Calculator – To figure out if the drinks package is worth it, let this tool do the math for you! It’ll tally up your drink costs and show you what you’d spend without it. Bottoms up!
Royal Caribbean Cruise Deck List – Click here to uncover a super-secret treasure trove of 100s of aggregated user reviews of specific Royal Caribbean cruise line cabins. Find your Cruise Ship (Oasis/ Symphony/ Mariner) and search to see if your cabin has been reviewed.
Celebrity Cruise Deck List – Click here to uncover a super-secret treasure trove of 54 pages of aggregated user reviews of specific Celebrity cruise line cabins. Search the pages for your Cruise Ship class (Reflection/Silhouette) to help you find the best cabin.
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